How awful that someone would neglect your heart like that. I will offer that I have relatives in the emergency services and they see so much struggle, injury, and death that they get desensitized to it. I think that is what you experienced. But I want to thank you for the a wonderful testimony I hear in your post. The joy you had with him to the very end. So many relationships just fall apart under that stress and for even less. You just told us with your words how much you loved him, and what you described is how much he loved you. He did not let his fate prevent him from expressing that love to the end. Your love strengthened him and he was strengthening you to the end. As for what happened in the mortuary, don’t let them undo what your husband offered you, reassurance resting in the love he left you with. I offer what Jesus taught us about that. Your husband was not in that body anymore. Jesus said of the moment that our soul leaves the body, “Wheresoever the body is, there will the vultures be gathered together.” Think about how horrible it sounds that our loved one’s body might be subject to vultures, yet Jesus reassured us, we are gone from that vessel. He also said, “Fear not those that after they have killed the body, they have no more that they can do to you.” Your husband was not in that body anymore. Trust Him. They did not hurt him. You will see your husband again. He promised.
69. In the morning my mouth will declare of you, you will be my song in the afternoon and yet also at night will I make melodies of what you have done and tell of how you poured peace upon my heart that is not moved and tossed to and fro by all around me but found an anchor in you upon which all am safely assured riding upon your comfort and dwelling in your peace.
48 I reach out for your commands, which I love, that I may meditate on your decrees. 49 Remember your word to your servant, for you have given me hope. 50 My comfort in my suffering is this: Your promise preserves my life. 51 The arrogant mock me unmercifully, but I do not turn from your law. 52 I remember, LORD, your ancient laws, and I find comfort in them.
When they're hurting, help them find their joy in You, for it's Your joy that will be their strength. Help them to trust You as their God of hope. Fill them with Your joy, peace, and hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Help them experience the love, joy, and peace that are the results of His life in them, no matter what they're going through. (Nehemiah 8:10b; Romans 15:13; Galatians 5:22)
Christ, light of light, brightness indescribable, the Wisdom, power and glory of God, the Word made flesh: you overcame the forces of Satan, redeemed the world, then ascended again to the Father. Grant me, I pray, in this tarnished world, the shining of your splendor. Send your Archangel Michael to defend me, to guard my going out and coming in, and to bring me safely to your presence, where you reign in the one holy and undivided Trinity, to ages of ages. Amen.
84. I declare my trust in you even as I come to the understanding that trust is a big factor in understanding peace and say no to fear taking a position in my life. I release the reins of my life unto you and ask that you take control of it all, I turn it over unto you and help me to make and see this confession daily that I might be able to continually enjoy peace knowing you are in control. Amen
I surrender and admit: I can't control people, plans, or even all my circumstances, but I can yield those things to you, and focus on your goodness. Thank you today for every good gift you've given, every blessing you've sent, all the forgiveness I did not deserve, and, yes, for every trial you've allowed into my life. You bring good out of every circumstance if I'll only let go and believe you. I know that when I pray and give thanks instead of worrying, you have promised that I can experience the kind of peace that passes all understanding. That's your kind of peace, Lord. And it's the kind I crave.